Hello friends! It’s February and love is in the air! I don’t know about you, but I love this month! We are firmly passed the holiday season, and entrenched in the gloomy days of winter! January always seems to be 74 days long… and you’re broke from Christmas… and your starting ‘all things new’… you know what I mean.
So, February seems like a breath of fresh air. Time to focus on the loved ones in our lives. And with a ‘love’ theme in mind, I thought we could use a little challenge for the month!
Who is this for?
This challenge is for the loved ones in your life. Originally, I thought it would be for our spouses only, but then decided I wanted it to be more inclusive and realized it would be just as relevant to include our kids, co-workers, good friends, insta-family or Facebook friends.
Why would I do this?
Also, I don’t want this to get super involved. That is, only as complicated as you have time for it to be! The important thing is just to reach out to those people we associate with on a regular basis and let them know they are loved and seen by you!
With that idea at the core, here is what I have planned. Every Friday this month I want us to plan a “small kindness” we can do for a loved one in our life. I will do this primarily with my hubby, but I will also plan a few things for my kids that are away at college too.
The details
- During the week plan one thing you can do for that person that is meant to be impactful to them.
- Keep it “free” or inexpensive as possible. (You can name your budget, but it’s more about the thought that counts.)
- Expect nothing in return.
- Remember, it’s all about them!
- Be flexible!
How do I know I’m being encouraging?
Ok. Now we have the basics, how do we know what is meaningful to the loved ones in our lives? Sometimes we think we know exactly what they want or need, and then some days, I have no earthly idea what is meaningful to them.
Check it out!
One book that might be helpful with this problem is by Gary Chapman, The 5 Love Languages. This book was written years ago but still has current applications. Basically, Gary preposes that every person has a primary “love language” and that they feel “most-loved” when we love on them using that language. It makes sense to me!
A quick overview of the 5 love languages
Words of Affirmation- You feel the most loved when others use their words to build you up or encourage you. Of course, these words need to be authentic or genuine in order to be effective!
Acts of Service- You feel most loved when others do things to help you. Your motto might be, “Actions speak louder than words.” Also, this requires thought, time, effort and preparation)
Receiving Gifts- You feel the most loved when you receive a tangible gift that is meaningful or thoughtful to you.
Quality Time- You feel most loved when you have someone’s undivided attention. Or, you feel like the center of their attention because they have put away distractions or carved out specific time to be with you.
Physical Touch- You fee the most loved when you are holding hands, hugging, having your head scratched, kissing by your significant other. This doesn’t need to be PDA.
Interestingly, like most things in life, most people have a combination of these love languages. For example, my primary language is “quality time”, but I also feel loved when I experience “acts of service.” For me, “quality time” far outweighs the others, but I do like ALL of the others to a smaller degree as well.
My own example.
A specific example of this was just last night. One of our couple goals this year is to “not work” and have a “stay at home” date-night every week. So, last night we got home by 6:30 pm, put together a simple meal, watched a movie, snuggled on the couch and talked about easy topics. We were intentionally planning a “time-out” from our everyday obligations in order to focus on each other. Keeping it low-stress, simple, inexpensive or free and distraction-free.
Note
Since we don’t live in a bubble, we know that unexpected things always come up. Plans sometimes get canceled or rescheduled, but we try to be flexible, triage the problem, or depending on the situation, we chose to ignore it until a later time.
So, keeping in mind your love-one and their love language, I’ve made a list of ideas that will help get the ball rolling! I tried to make sure I touched on each of the 5 love languages mentioned above!
Simple ideas for your “Small Kindness Challenge”
Write a simple note
Give them a card
Send them a sweet text
Call them at an unexpected time to tell them you’re thinking of them…
Make them coffee, tea, favorite beverage and take it to them
Write a note of encouragement on their mirror in the bathroom
Give them a favorite candy
Go for a walk with them
Go to a local coffee shop or cafe to sit and talk
Hold their hand at an unexpected time
Give them a hug or kiss when they leave the house AND when they return
Let them pick the movie to watch
Rub their feet
Scratch their head
Snuggle on the couch
Take a drive and chat
Make their favorite snack
Tell them what they do well
Tell them one thing you like about their personality
Tell them one thing you like about the way they look
These are just a few things to help you get the wheels turning! What we want to do is think kind, simple, everyday acts that will encourage the other person!
You can do this!
Hopefully, this sounds doable and fun! I encourage you to share this challenge with others! Get them in on the fun too! You never know what someone else is battling within… even your own spouse! A simple act of kindness could be just the thing they need at the moment they needed it!
I want to hear from you friends! If you have ideas or thoughts please leave a comment below! If you’re on Instagram please use the hashtag #smallkindnesschallenge . If you’re on Facebook, please share this post and share your small act of kindness with me!
Happy Weekend y’all!
Cindyh
